We need more women showing up with confidence in the world. And what I’m hearing from many is that they are held back. They’re frustrated with their style because they don’t know what to wear that feels comfortable and looks good.
Either their bodies have changed and nothing fits, or they always wear the same thing because they don’t know what else to try.
And despite the range in age, different personalities and lifestyles, it’s the same issue that holds these women back.
They’re uncomfortable in their own skin.
Sometimes the discomfort sits on top of anger and frustration. Like when I injured my shoulder, I got mad at my body. Its limited mobility kept me from doing what I wanted. You may feel frustrated by your body because it doesn’t look how you like in clothes.
Then there’s the discomfort that comes from fear and insecurity. This is when you’re too afraid to try something because you don’t want to mess up or get judged. It feels safer to blend in so you hide in your clothes.
If you want to have a style that feels comfortable and looks good, it starts with the way you relate to your body.
Women who harbor anger and resentment towards their bodies will always struggle with style. Because when they look in the mirror they only see flaws. How can you feel satisfied with your outfit when you believe your body isn’t good enough? You can’t.
Weight gain is a big reason women feel frustrated by their bodies, but it’s not the only one. My aging body gets me mad. I hate when I can’t do something physically. When I see others dancing fiercely— like how I used to — it makes me sad. And even though I know that comparing myself to others— or even how I used to be— is an energy suck…I still do it sometimes.
Building the confidence to feel comfortable in your own skin is a practice. It can take a while to get good at, but it’s never too late to begin. Here’s 3 tips to help you get started so you have a style that feels comfortable and looks good.
Click play to watch the video for the 3 tips.
And read on for more stylist advice.
There’s a wild voice running around your brain. It’s goal is to keep you safe, but if you want to do anything new and different, this voice will try to hold you back. The first step to feeling more comfortable in your skin is to notice when your wild voice kicks in.
By paying attention and noticing the negativity, you’ll be able to redirect the thoughts. So if you’re looking in the mirror, and your eyes go straight to your stomach…notice what that voice says. If it sounds like “you’re fat,” or “you don’t look good”…notice that thought. Awareness is necessary when you want to make a change.
Instead of giving up on yourself because you believe nothing looks good, modify what you wear. With my shoulder injury, I had to completely reimagine my exercise routine. What used to feel good no longer worked. I had to come up with new exercises that gave me what I was looking for — to build strength and energy.
You may need to readjust your outfits so they work for your body. Figure out what styles suit your new shape and wear those. When you feel good in your clothes, it inspires you to do better. So if you want to lose weight, rather than wear the ill fitting items that make you feel bad, put on something that gives you energy. When you’re energized, you’re motivated to hit your weightloss goals.
You know when you’re with a loved one, and you want to say or do something nice so they feel good? Do the same for your body. Compliment it! If you’re feeling low, this could mean extra kindness and compassion like giving yourself time to rest and relax without judgement. Or you could use this tip in conjunction with tip #2 and buy yourself some complimentary new clothes that make you look and feel great.
Don’t skimp on yourself! Do the opposite. The pandemic showed us that by taking care of ourselves, we’re also tending to others. Your self care routine is the same! When you treat yourself with love and acceptance, you’re standing up for what matters. And this is the action of someone who is comfortable in their own skin.
One thing I do with my clients is help them find clothes that compliment their bodies which is a key component to feeling comfortable in their skin. If you need help with your style, let’s talk. Book a free call so we can look at where you’re getting stuck, and how to feel more confident in your clothes. Click here to book your call now!