We’ve all heard of the “crisis” that’s supposed to accompany midlife, but it’s one of those things you don’t really understand until it slaps you in the face. Then you’re like “OHHHHH! This is what they were talking about!” …as your identity comes crashing down.
Questions arise like, “How am I supposed to be ME when everything now looks different?” Your roles have changed (both with work and at home). Your body isn’t what it used to be. Your sense of purpose starts to waver.
Thankfully, you’re not alone.
Millions of self help books were written on the topic, but I find the fiction stories to be most revealing. Midlife awakening tropes range from the suburban mom who buys a motorcycle at 50 to the buttoned up attorney who dyes her hair purple and joins a punk band. The story plots vary, but the main character’s message is always the same — If I didn’t do it, I would’ve faded away into oblivion!
Makes me wonder — is that all there is? Either go big and flashy or fade into oblivion?
While I love the playfulness at the heart of “What would it be like as one of those ride or die types?” Or “How would I feel as a rockstar?” … And then making the radical decision to go find out.
It’s a bit extreme.
What if you want to keep being YOU, just the next level YOU who exudes vitality and is full of life.
AND also….YOU want to LOOK FABULOUS.
You can!
There’s no age limit on becoming who you want to be. You just have to stay engaged with the process by consciously CHOOSING FOR who you are BECOMING.
This is your Reinvention Era.
And there’s an opportunity to make the most of it each day.
THE DAILY ACT OF GETTING DRESSED
Each morning when you get dressed, you make a choice that redefines how it all gets to go. You may not even realize it’s happening because unlike the flashy decisions of the typical midlife tropes, your everyday outfit picks seem subtle. Unimportant even.
That’s why so many women miss out on the opportunity to reinvent themselves, and continue along in their old ways. It’s why when they look in the mirror instead of seeing their futures, they see their pasts. They’ve stopped becoming.
You can’t blame them though. The pivotal moment, the time to choose for the future, is disguised in the daily routine. That’s why it often goes unrecognized. Rather than seeing this decision as a critical turning point, many women turn on autopilot. They go through the motions and ask themselves the same thing they’ve been asking their entire lives:
“What should I wear?”
This is the wrong question to ask in the Reinvention Era.
THE DYNAMIC CYCLES
Your Reinvention Era has a life force that’s either pulling you into the UPWARD cycle, or it’s dragging you into the DOWNWARD cycle. It’s important to know where you’re at so you can keep the current moving in the right direction, or redirect if necessary
(Press play on the video above👆to hear me explain more on the DYNAMIC CYCLES.)
When you ask yourself “What should I wear?”, you’re triggering the DOWNWARD cycle. Think about it: what happens when you ask yourself this question?
I know from my styling clients that it causes them to focus on what they don’t have — both inventory and information. (I don’t have anything to wear! I don’t know what to wear!) This is limiting! It keeps them from trying anything new. Which is why they feel so stuck, uninspired by how they look.
A better question to ask is “Who do I choose to be?” which triggers the UPWARD cycle. Not only does this question spark creativity, but it focuses on your evolution by opening the door to connect with yourself and express who you are becoming. Also note, you have agency here — unlike the “should” that goes with what should I wear — you get to decide who you choose to be. But you must decide!
BECOMING IN YOUR REINVENTION ERA
The Reinvention Era is your time to get ready for what’s next because your old ways aren’t satisfying anymore. You know you’re in this stage when you crave something new. You’re desiring your next iteration!
I see a lot of women ignoring their craving for newness. They act as if nothing has changed and continue along with their old ways which leads to resentment. (Often taken out on those around them.) Don’t ignore the change — it’s happening whether you like it or not!
I also see a lot of women act on this craving, but it becomes more of a dopamine hit rather than a curation of their new era.
For example, let’s say you’re drawn to a stylish woman or you see some clothes in a store — and you love it all. So you buy it all! But then you get these new pieces in your wardrobe, and you know they’re not you. You’ll never wear them. And if you do end up wearing them, you feel off. Like you tried too hard. That’s the dopamine rush come-down.
Remember, the problem isn’t that you’re drawn to newness. This is the sign you’re ready to reinvent!
The problem is you don’t know how it looks. You don’t know how YOU look at your next level.
So you buy the wrong things. That’s why you don’t feel good in your clothes.
PERSONAL STYLE FOR PERSONAL POWER
The beauty of the Reinvention Era is that its cycles are dynamic. You can turn them around and redirect the energy.
Which is exactly how I help my clients.
I show them how to use their personal style to support their personal evolution so they can retrieve more personal power. And I do this by helping them progress in the UPWARD cycle.
It’s true that an updated, curated wardrobe is definitely a benefit of working with me. But it’s their new way of being — exploding with confidence — that really stands out.
Curious what it looks like to work with me virtually? Press play on the video below where I take you behind the scenes of my stylist prep for a client session.
Need help navigating your reinvention era with confidence and style? Go here to learn more about my style reinvention styling service.
Or go here to book a call and we’ll discuss your unique situation, who you are becoming and how I can help you elevate your look so it’s aligned with your next stage.