If the next stage in life holds the promise of something new, why do so many women get stuck waiting in the wings? Whether it’s a new job, a new way of working with clients, a new love, or a new place to live — NEWNESS intrigues! So what’s keeping us from marching onto that next stage, rising up to the next level and boldly claiming this FRESH direction?
As a personal style expert who specializes in helping women elevate their image and claim the spotlight, I’ve noticed there are 3 reasons women get stuck. It’s why they keep themselves small and hold themselves back from fulfilling their next level roles. I’ll share all 3 right now!
3 Reasons You Get Stuck Waiting In The Wings Of Your Next Stage In Life
1. Self Consciousness
While browsing old photos with my daughter, we found one of me, age 16, wearing a bikini and awkwardly covering my stomach with my arms. Embarrassment oozed off the photo — so much so that my daughter said, “Aw, I feel bad for you.”
At that stage of life, self consciousness informed my every move. Like a constant voice ringing in my ear, it said, “You look ridiculous! They’re laughing at you.”
My clients experience this too. One mentioned she hides her face during Zoom calls since seeing herself stirs up too much negativity. Another confessed that when entering a room, her first thought is always that there’s something wrong with how she looks.
Self consciousness hates the spotlight. It’s one of the reasons we get stuck waiting in the wings.
2. Self Doubt
If self consciousness is a state of mind, self doubt is a belief about one’s abilities. Frequently referred to as imposter syndrome, it’s that moment waiting in the wings when every bone in your body says “You don’t have what it takes to fulfill that next role!” You tell yourself that you have no business being even near that next stage.
Do you know that expression crippled with doubt? This is what happens while waiting in the wings — you’re frozen, and can’t find your way forward because you believe you aren’t capable, or you’re not enough to handle what’s next.
So many women spend years grappling in the wings, which is exactly how self doubt likes it!
3. Self Sabotage
When I first moved to NYC in the early 90s, I wanted to be an actress so I signed up for acting lessons at HB Studio in the West Village. I barely ever made it to class. The night before, I often stayed out late, making it hard to wake up on time the next morning. Or I just didn’t go. My self sabotage was rooted in my belief that I didn’t have what it took to be an actor. I was also self conscious that I didn’t dress commercial enough, like the other girls.
Self sabotage is sneaky AF. You have to pay super close attention to notice how it keeps you stuck in the wings.
The Triple Threat
If you’re stuck waiting in the wings, here’s what to know about self consciousness, self doubt and self sabotage:
Individually — they’re strong enough to hold you back. But when combined, they form a triple threat that’ll make it feel impossible to get onto the next stage.
There is one thing that cuts through the destructive force.
Expecting Acceptance.
This is about knowing you’ll be welcomed on the next stage, in the spotlight, just as you are. It’s feeling valued and included without having to change or hide any part of yourself.
One of the ways I help my clients expect acceptance is by elevating their self image.
Claim Your Next Level With A New Way Of Seeing Yourself
When women can see themselves worthy of fulfilling their next role, they’re able to command the next stage, and have fun with it!
I use their wardrobes to help them achieve this. Once they have the right clothes, they feel energized by how they look which causes things to shift.
Others start seeing them differently.
They receive compliments. New opportunities come in. People want to talk to them.
THEY BECOME MORE CONFIDENT!
When this happens consistently — which it does when you work with me — they start seeing themselves in a new way.
Look at my client above. NOW she sees herself very differently compared to how she saw herself THEN.
Her CURATED wardrobe led to her ELEVATED self image.
Keep reading to see what’s next!
The Next Level Of Personal Style
After you curate your wardrobe, and elevate your self image, the next step is to dial up your charisma so you become a CAPTIVATING PRESENCE!
This is the next level of personal style and it’s about showing up authentically and effortlessly accessing your natural gifts and charms to amplify your power, and experience true connection — to yourself and others.
Here are the steps to boldly claim the spotlight and show up with charisma:
- Curate
- Elevate
- CAPTIVATE
It’s exciting to see my clients go through this! Once overlooked, these women now not only receive compliments — they command their next stage! And they’re having so much fun with it!
Watch the video where I share the unexpected outcome that my client experienced while working with me on dialing up her charisma.
To summarize: the spark that propels you out of the wings, and onto your next stage is true confidence.
Your clothes can kick start this experience!
First — curate your wardrobe so you elevate your self image.
Then — dial up your charisma for a captivating presence.
This is the work I do with my clients so if you’re feeling the call to get out of the wings and boldly claim your next level with charisma, I’d love to help you make this happen!
Depending on your specific situation, you have 2 options for how we can work together.
Here’s some guidance on determining which option will serve you best!
OPTION #1: Style Reinvention
Which makes you say, “THAT’S ME!” from the below?
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Feeling uncertain about what really looks *great* on you.
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Having too many clothes, or not enough of the RIGHT clothes. Your closet is overwhelming.
✔ ️
Desiring more knowledge and confidence in what to wear.
✔ ️
Wearing the same old stuff. It’s boring and repetitive, but you have no idea what else to try.
✔ ️
Wanting to modernize your look!
✔ ️
Wishing you could get dressed easily.
✔
Wasting energy (+ time + money) worrying about how you look.
✔
Wasting more energy (+ time + money) in the hassle of buying and returning clothes that don’t work.
✔ ️
Fantasizing about having a complimentary wardrobe that feels like YOU!
✔
Acknowledging it’s time to prioritize yourself.
Basically, you’re incredibly competent in most areas of your life, it’s just this one space — around your wardrobe and style — that holds you back.
If at least 8 of the above situations speak to you, you need to dial in on your wardrobe and elevate your self image — which is exactly what you’ll do in Style Reinvention.
Through a combination of style discovery, closet refinements, outfits styling and deliberate shopping, I’ll help you curate your wardrobe so it hits the sweet spot — meaning you love everything, you know it looks good, and you’re excited to wear it now!
Go here to get started on your Style Reinvention.
OPTION #2: Style Charisma VIP
Which — from the below — makes you say: “THAT’S ME!”?
✔
Fairly certain about your style, though some days are better than others.
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Have clear outfit formulas, ready to wear.
✔ ️
Leading the room — whether on camera (Zoom) or in-person — is part of your routine.
✔ ️
Dressing the part comes pretty easily, but now you’d like to raise the bar and have more fun — PLAYING a more powerful, charismatic role.
✔
Inspiring and influencing others? You’re totally up for making an impact wherever you go!
✔ ️
Would love a refreshing twist on your current look that’s more aligned with your next stage of life.
✔ ️
Self consciousness, self doubt and self sabotage still get in your way, making it tough to stay on top of your game.
✔
Recognizing the gaps between your presence and impact and that you need help filling in these gaps to fully claim the spotlight.
✔ ️
Seeking HIGH-LEVEL alignment so your image 100% matches your vibe, creating a powerful connection to your true self that attracts others.
✔
Willing to make yourself a priority, and receive exquisite support. You know the power of investing in yourself to get to the next level.
Basically, you’re an authentic powerhouse ready to show up in your STAR ⭐️ POWER – and BE the light that raises the vibe and inspires everyone around you!
If 8 or more of the above situations resonate with you, then it’s time to dial up your charisma for a captivating presence which is what you’ll do in Style Charisma!
This is the next level of personal style, in a VIP experience, where you’ll REAL-ize your natural gifts and charms to energize your every move. First, you’ll fine-tune your image so it’s current and in full alignment with where you’re going (not where you’ve been). Then you’ll amplify your presence to experience true connection — within yourself and with others — so you LEAD with your STAR POWER, and become the person you know yourself to be on the inside, but have always struggled to become (on your own, without support.)
Go here to get started with Style Charisma VIP!
Curious about YOUR natural gifts and charms?
Click play on the video below to learn more about your strengths and unique appeal.