There are two main reasons that you’re struggling to figure out or define your style. Either you’ve lost touch with the part of yourself that cares, and you’ve settled into toleration, or you’re in transition, and your life looks different.
Whether you’re stuck in yoga pants and ready to move on, or your life circumstances have changed—like a divorce, kids becoming more independent, a new job, or changes in your body—there’s one key thing to remember: Don’t look outside yourself. That approach won’t serve you best.
Instead of turning to social media, other women, or Hollywood for style advice, look within. Your personal style is an extension of your growth. You need to look inside first, before reflecting it outward
Watch the video where I share the primary building blocks to figure out or define your style.
And read on to learn more about defining your style.
Styling The In-Between Is Never A Good Look
As your life changes due to a new identity, your style must change too. And in that transition there is always that moment (which can drag out for months, even years) when you’re in-between.
The old you is no more. You can’t go back there. Yet you aren’t settled into the new you. So you have nothing to wear that feels right!
Your style becomes a lackluster expression of who you used to be with no real sense of the person you’re becoming.
Your Authentic Expression
Since your style is your way of being, why not make it come from the core? Rather than following what others say about how you should look or be, stick with what you know. Because the fact is, the more real you can be in who you are and how you look, the easier it will be to share it with the world. It’s you. And it looks fabulous.
So to fully step into the woman you are becoming – wearing the right outfits and all – there are 3 primary building blocks to understand.
The Primary Building Blocks To Define Your Style
1. Self Awareness
By knowing who you are, you’re better equipped to state yourself style wise. On one level, it’s knowing your preferences – what you love and what you dislike- which shape your taste. But on a deeper level, it’s about knowing what makes you feel good, and how to access that. Your style is the outer reflection of the inner so the more you are in touch with how you want to be, the easier it is to dress for that.
2. Letting Go
In personal development, the idea of letting go gets compared to the peeling of an onion. You keep shedding the outer layer – your outdated beliefs and habits – until eventually you reach the core. This translates to style by letting go of your outdated clothing. As you age, your tastes will shift and change. And often we don’t allow our closets to keep up with the change. Our wardrobes become this holding tank of all we used to be, what we hoped we would become and more. By letting go of what no longer serves, we clear the space to allow room for who we are today, and for what’s true at the core. (If you need to let go of your clothes, checkout the guided closet cleanout here!)
3. Taking Ownership
No matter what size, shape, or age you are… when you own your style, you’ll always stand out. In fact, I’ve seen women wear outrageous outfits which border on ridiculous, but because they own it…they look great. That’s because WHAT you wear isn’t nearly as important as HOW you wear it.
What’s the attitude behind the outfit? When you relay a message of confidence – people pay attention. Because who doesn’t want some of that? Having confidence means you don’t care about being in style. You’ve created your own style. And you love how it looks.
One way to tap into your personal style is to get into your closet and see what you can create. My free “Shop Your Closet” guide will help you do this by showing you how to style a new outfit using clothes you already own. Go here to download this free guide.